Once, the word “no” seemed very distant to me.
I grew up in a school like many others that taught us that we should always try and help others even if it seemed to hard.
Like many others, this ended up causing me becoming a “Yes” man, and not being able to say no.
As I grew older, I noticed that some people were simply selfish and only thought about themselves. We all have true friends and family who care for us but life also delivers people who only look out for themselves, even though it doesn’t always seem that way.
People would ask me for favors that unsettled me, but i still wanted to help. I would always say yes and in the end it would cost me dearly, each time paying for my mistake and regretting it. In the end we all learn our lessons the hard way and saying no to people was a challenge, but I have overgrown my fear in time.
I have learned that People who just can’t say no are driven by a few simple fear-based thought processes:
Fear of what others will think (Shame, Guilt, Status)
Fear of losing a connection or relationship (Loss)
Fear of the results of “inaction” and subsequent “harm” and resulting “guilt” (Responsibility, Expectations, Opportunity, Chance)
Fear of real or imagined negative repercussions to self (Karma, Physical Harm, Retaliation)
Taking the time to reflect on what is driving your decision making process is key to making positive change.
Standing up for yourself and saying “No” can be tough, but is definitely worth it. For further information, and tips I recommend reading this article. Remember, you are your own gift and have the right to choose what’s right for yourself.
For more information and to get the help you need now, contact applied tx for a free assessment. Give us a call today, 888-583-0002